You strive, o man, and you strive again, your heart too proud to rest
You labor on, singing those songs, to cover your weakness
Do you fail to recall who you really are and Who caused you to be?
Return o man; return and rest, to a burden light and yoke easy
Abide in your Savior
Abide in His love
The labor of God is to trust in the Son
The labor of God is to trust in the Son
God isn't telling us to move mountains. To run a race. He's saying that our labor should be to trust Him. That is what we should strive for first and foremost - to live our lives in an attitude of trust in our Heavenly Father. To rest in Him alone.
It sounds so simple, yet it's so hard! I grew up in a family that had crazy work ethic. My dad gets up at 2:30 every other morning to milk cows and doesn't get done till 7 pm at night. Yes, I think he's crazy - but I also admire him and in a lot of ways I'm proud that my dad is "crazy" enough to work harder than anyone else I know. Ever since I was a little girl I put a ton of value in work - I helped my dad and uncle feed cows, build fence, drive tractors, milk cows, help with harvest, and more. I loved the feeling of coming inside after the sun had set; hot, sweaty, and tired - but with a sense of accomplishment of a job well done.
Ministry is totally different. It's way more thinking. It's a lot of never seeing the results, but trusting that God is going to do what He wants with what you spent hours of time preparing. It's building relationships and then wondering if what you're doing is accomplishing any good. It is hard.
And yet...God is teaching me to trust Him with the results and in some ways I think I'm beginning to learn how to do that.
And then...I got sick. A sickness that would strike me every couple of weeks and pretty much knock me out of commission for several days. I've missed days of work. I've missed TFC meetings. So many times I've been stuck laying on the couch while someone else had to step up and fill my place.
I HATE IT. So, so much. I feel like a pansy. I feel like if I were my dad I'd be up and at em' and already slinging around hay bales. I finally had surgery last week to fix this problem and now am in the recovery process. I was SO excited to finally be on the road of getting this all behind me! And now...on a Wednesday night where I was supposed to be at a TFC meeting - I was again at home on the couch. It's been five days since I've had surgery...and yet I was totally expecting to be back to normal life by now. And finally (yes, I'm a little slow) I began to think...hm...maybe God is actually trying to teach me something here. This has been going on since September so it only took me a little bit...
Today I had a friend tell me that God loves me despite what I do or don't do - He would love me even if I couldn't do anything - That my worth is who I am in Him and anything that comes against that truth is wrong. I knew this, but I needed that reminder. This past summer I began to stand on the truth that because of Jesus I am enough - I don't have to keep striving after this unattainable goal of being "perfect" for everyone. Obviously I didn't learn this lesson completely since once again God is His vast wisdom has brought something else into my life to show me just how far I still have to go.
So as I once again sit on this couch, I'm again discovering that I need to let go of finding my worth in what I accomplish. My worth should always and ONLY come from Jesus. And the thought of how much He loves me...even though I can do no good thing honestly brings tears to my eyes. We serve such a beautiful Savior! One who saw that we could never live the life that was demanded - and so came down from heaven to live for us - to die for us so that we could be with Him. Isn't that breathtaking?? And so why do I insist on taking pride in my accomplishments and come to despair when I feel like I'm not doing enough when Jesus has already done it all?!
The labor of God is to trust in the Son.
Give me a steadfast spirit to rest in You alone.
